We promised to bring you more conversation about civics and engagement - and today we get to bring you a “real talk” episode about one of our favorite topics - civics, engagement, and a White Woman’s Work.  Plus, as a special bonus, we do this in conversation with NYT Bestselling Author Kate Schatz - a queer white woman - who is basically the perfect human being to tackle these topics with.  

We talk about what she’d say to white women if she could say absolutely anything, the interconnectedness of oppression while avoiding devolving into the Oppression Olympics, how to figure out what to ask fellow white people about racism instead of asking people of color, 

How white women can channel a little more bravery once they know what’s really at risk - which is tied into the mic drop moment when she references Trevor Noah - and really importantly, the folks and civic organizations who are actually making huge differences that we can each get behind. Consider this your “DWW ease in” to our civics focus, but any way you think of this, you should listen, and then get all of your friends to do the same, as we kick off 2023.

One of our philosophies is that anti-racism work has to be done in a way that’s sustainable - meaning, just like we can’t post a black square to Instagram and say we’re done, we also can’t spread ourselves too thin or work ourselves to the point of irredeemable fatigue because then we also stop having impact.  

So to kick off this year, we are bringing you a really open conversation on a topic we don’t as a society speak openly about Women’s health (which, for men, is often just called “health.”)

In particular, we want you to know this conversation is specifically NOT reproductive health, which is often what women’s health is solely classified as, but rather all the things that happen with our bodies related to our hormones, periods, menopause, symptoms, and society’s lack of support.  To have this conversation in partnership, we bring you the founder of a groundbreaking, personalized, online Traditional Chinese Medicine company.  
Because if we can work to support and balance ourselves from the root causes upwards, we will be able to be more vibrant impactful versions of ourselves. 

This was a conversation that made us lose track of time.  Because even if the core conversation about transracial adoption doesn’t capture your attention - which it should because nearly 30% of kids who are adopted are adopted across borders or across cultures or race - the trajectory this conversation takes into why adoption should NOT be positioned as a solution to abortion absolutely is a perspective you don’t want to miss - along with all the other nuggets of wisdom around identity and belonging as well.

Thrilled to be bringing you insights from Patrick Armstrong, someone we don’t just know from the virtual airwaves but now, thanks to some great opportunities to speak together, in real life too. And if you want to hear more about his journey as not only an adoptee, but as an outspoken advocate for adoptees and, due to his lived experience, transracial adoptees in particular, you’re going to want to listen all the way to the end, and then follow him on every platform out there.

It’s December, the time of year when it seems like regardless of whether you celebrate Christmas or Hannukah or Kwanzaa or anything else or nothing at all, our schedules get busy. And lots of times, this busyness centers around food, be it potluck gatherings at work, holiday parties, big family dinners, or even coffee and treats with friends - because food brings us together as human beings better than almost anything else.

But what happens when the foods you have are scoffed at by the folks around you? How does it feel to be made to feel “different” from the other Americans around you based on your cultural heritage? How do you get kids to try new flavors and learn real history, let’s be honest, at this stage in the melting pot game, what makes something American, anyway? We’re here to talk about all that and more with an award-winning veteran journalist Michelle Li - who also created the Very Asian Foundation after a super shocking (now viral) viewer comment in response to her comment about dumplings on television.

For those of you who have been listening to Dear White Women from the beginning, or for those listeners who just joined us (welcome!), you probably understand that this whole platform comes from our own deeply personal connections not only to this work but to the world that we’d like to see in the future, as we find that it’s often that personal connection that leads to intentional, lasting change.

That’s why we loved speaking with today’s guest, Stacy Sawin, who comes to us with her own deeply personal story as to why she created FinAbility, an organization that is changing and enhancing security for so many survivors of domestic abuse – especially from a financial perspective. A huge percentage of survivors are experiencing financial abuse along with other forms of harm, so even if her story has nothing to do with your own lived experiences, it’s likely that someone you know can relate - so please listen, share, and, if you’re listening to this on the day it comes out, financially support on this Giving Tuesday, if you’re able.

For a lot of the second half of this year, student debt relief and the student loan crisis have been in national news - and there have been a LOT of feelings about it, ranging from joy and happiness that some of this extreme burden to repay what often can amount to predatory lending practices has now been lifted to the other extreme, which amounts to a lot of “well, I repaid my debt. Why should others be getting a handout?” (If you know us, you know where we fall on that scale.)

But there’s so much more to this story than the question of handouts versus the student debt crisis, because, much like so many other things in the United States, student debt and student loans have also been affected by systemic racism. This is why we’re so thrilled to have Briana Franklin as our guest today, to talk about how and why student loan debt disproportionately affects Black women, her own experience with this as a Dartmouth graduate, and why she decided to do something about this - in a big way.

Hey so remember how last week we were talking about how we have hope? This is another conversation and way of thinking that gives me hope - in particular for anybody who knows children, knows new parents, or thinks they might eventually know folks who might want to stop reading the outdated encyclopedia that we call What to Expect when you’re Expecting and flip over to a more contemporary, inclusive, humane book to learn about parenting.

Misasha got the opportunity to speak with Jelani Memory recently on their Better Grownups podcast and we’re thrilled to bring him back to discuss the company’s newest venture - 100 Diverse Voices on Parenthood.

If you’re reading this on the day this episode comes out, this is a big, big day in America. It’s Election Day 2022, and we don’t think it’s an understatement to say that this is the most important election that those of us who have the privilege to vote in will be voting in - because this election may determine if you or I even get to be able to vote in the next election. So, if you’re reading this and have not yet voted today - stop reading, and please, please go vote. We need everyone’s voice in these elections, as the alternative may be that our voices no longer matter. And now onto some hope…

This is the first time that we’ve had hope in a long, long time, thanks to the book How We Win The Civil War. In today’s conversation with author Steve Phillips, we’re going to discuss the idea that the Civil War never really ended (yup, get ready…) - and also how we can finally win it, with some very concrete ideas and action items for us all at the end of this episode. This may be the episode you need to hear today, on election day, or tomorrow (and every day past that point), when we need to keep fighting, for all of us.

Have you ever had your eyes glaze over when someone hands you a history textbook or walks you through a museum full of facts and dates? But then you hate yourself because you are smart and yet don’t feel like you *know* things? I’ve been that person (it’s Sara here) - which is why I’m absolutely thrilled to share this conversation with the authors of a fabulous historical fiction novel that taught me SO MUCH about American history and the Civil War in particular. We learned so much in reading this book, in particular about experiences that were never taught in school, or were glossed over in favor of a simpler narrative.

The book is The Thread Collectors - go get it from our Bookshop.org page for the Dear White Women podcast - and it was written by two friends, a Black woman, and a White Jewish woman. Think about how much weight there is just in that partnership alone.

This conversation takes us deep into belonging, the lessons we learn from history that are SO relevant today, and the hope we all still have for where we can go from here.

When you think of physical education, or PE, or gym class - what do you remember? Probably the physical side of it, like jump rope or pull-ups or dodgeball or kickball. But what blew our mind in today’s conversation is all of the seemingly invisible, yet intentional, ways PE class teaches us about social interactions, our own capabilities, deconstructing perfectionism, and more - and frighteningly, how so many schools in the US now don’t mandate PE, as it’s a class that’s having to fight for its right to exist in the education system.

As we kick off the new 2022-2023 school year, listen to what we’ll be missing out on in our next generation if we don’t start thinking about what and how we teach our children.

Someone very smart sent me an article just today that talks about the role of humor when we deal with stressful situations/anxiety-creating moments. And on that front: have any of you (and in this moment, I think we’re specifically talking to White people) ever felt weighed down by how heavy anti-racism work can be?  You maybe noticed that sometimes we’re pretty serious on this show…  

A huge hello and welcome to author Kate Schatz - author, activist, educator, and queer feminist mama who’s been talking, writing, and teaching about race, gender, social justice, and equity for many years. She’s also an incredible person who wrote a blurb in support of our book and showed up IN PERSON to host our Dear White Women book launch tour in San Francisco!

So what do you all think about listening to about 15 minutes of one of the funniest activist-comedians out there today - hearing how HE, a funny guy, might explain what might be great for White women to do in this work, how to process how tired we all are, and what crocheting has to do with it.

In all of this anti-racism work, have you ever had a time when the fear of making a mistake kept you from speaking up?  It’s not every day we get to interview a NYT bestselling author who’s willing to share how she’s made mistakes so that you know we ALL mess up from time to time.  

A huge hello and welcome to author Kate Schatz - author, activist, educator, and queer feminist mama who’s been talking, writing, and teaching about race, gender, social justice, and equity for many years.  She’s also an incredible person who wrote a blurb in support of our book and showed up IN PERSON to host our Dear White Women book launch tour in San Francisco!  

If you’ve got kids, go buy her Rad Women book series, and now, go buy the workbook she co-authored with next week’s guest, Kamau Bell - it’s called Do the work: An AntiRacist Activity Book.  Which I just found in the library too!  But it’s much better to buy your own copy so you can write all throughout it.  Listen in to learn about what she’s hearing from White women, what sorts of mistakes she’s made - especially White women, listen up, we all make mistakes! So get over it and GO DO THE WORK - and listen to how you can use this workbook in your own life. 

Today we’re going to speak with Candacy Taylor about her carefully researched book about the Green Book, called the Overground Railroad (doesn’t the title alone make you want to hear more)? We not only discuss the immense hurdles and realities for Black people who were just trying to go somewhere by car, but we also discuss topics like sundown towns (you may be surprised to hear that you might be living in one, historically), how institutionalized racism appears through overpasses, and what we all can do to make change right now.